It’s not rocket science

Lately, I have been thinking about dating. Not so much about me dating, but the concept in general, although I would be lying if I don’t concede that at least some of it has to do with me.

Through the ages, we are bombarded with the simplicity of it all – boy meets girl, boy likes girl, boy dates girl, cue Happily-ever-after-ride-off-into-the-sunset music. This is the image implanted into every young (and not-so-young) girl’s mind. It’s the way we’re taught it is supposed to work. Yet, more often than not, this is not the case. We are invariably faced with the difficult diatribes of the opposite sex to the point where we start to feel that stepping out of the door is like accepting an invitation to go dancing on a mine field.

Perhaps the problem is that I have antiquated ideals when it comes to dating. Call me a romantic if you must, but I still believe in the simplest set of standards, let‘s call them my eight easy steps:


If you like me, you want to be with me. And don’t give me that crap about you’re afraid of hurting me and the timing is wrong and you’re afraid of getting hurt and you’re busy at work and, and, ad nauseum… I don’t buy it. If you like someone, you like them and you want to be with them. End of story. There are no exceptions.


If you say you’re going to call, you call. And No, a text doesn’t count, nor does a Facebook message or a tweet or an email or an IM. You pick up the phone and you call me. You are not too busy, because I am worth your time. If I’m not, then you’re not worth mine.


Buy me flowers, even if you can’t figure out what they mean. Okay, it’s not really about the flowers, but the principle of the matter is that you show someone you care, you don’t say it.


I am like a rare lost treasure, if you find me, you should want to tell the whole damn world about it. This does not presuppose that I am vain, but I do value my own worth, as I value yours. You should want not only to be with me, but to be around me.


Time is not our enemy. I know that life moves at warped speed, but that does not mean we have to. Get to know me, I guarantee you that you will not be sorry.


If you say something, mean it with every fibre of your being. I will invariably see through your bullshit, so you might as well be straight with me about the great and not so great things from the word go. You should begin and end with honest communication. Also, I do not have some built-in radar that intuitively tells me what you want. If you don’t tell me, how am I supposed to know?


Do not make me doubt. I did not enter myself into some game show with other contestants where I may eventually get to ‘win’ you. I’m not asking for your constant reassurance of loyalty, I shouldn’t need that, because I should not doubt it to begin with.


K I S S – Keep it simple, Stupid! Dating is not complicated, people are.



Basics, right? It seems that there must be more to it, but there really isn’t. I am not daft enough to think that these things alone will make for a carefree relationship, but it certainly is the fundamental foundations. Its not rocket science, you know…