In vino veritas (My most ardent wish is you)


You look at me with that distinct look of carnal courtship as we sip our wine and escape into the connection we find without fault every time. Your gentle eyes ignite my passion with the burn of a bountiful pleasure yearned for but forgotten amidst the distractions of a life disconnected from that which matters to me. You lick your lips and it feels wrong that they are not touching mine. Your heart beat pulses through my veins and tears all conscious thought away from my brain so desperately trying to regain function. Trying so desperately to remember a moment before this one, a moment before I willed the world to turn slower, to prolong the inevitable split second when this feeling of frustration that excites me to the very depth and breadth and height my soul can reach will be summarily ripped from my life, without warning, without kindness, leaving only darkness, ever increasing. That split second when you will look away and disappear, leaving me haunted with the treacherous wondering of what if.


I allow myself to be enveloped in the ecstasy of feeling my pulse quicken, my senses delighting in the allure of anticipation. I take a breath, try again to steady myself against my own fallible footing. You take one step closer, your presence surrounding me as your hand finds the nape of my neck, tilting my head back. You smile that wicked grin that makes my legs weak and my heart explode with an emotion that is so strong it is barely controllable. I savour the sweet seduction of your mouth finding mine, your kisses intensify as your touch on my skin sweeps us away to another world.


A dream world where the essence of time and the bonds of reality have no right to encroach on this mysterious power your presence has to colour my desires a deeper shade of red. A world where being with you, and you being with me, is the point of it all. A world where my wish is nothing short of that which must be. You draw me closer to you and my tumultuous soul gives way to the trembling of my being. My numb naked heart offers no defence as you bewitch my mind and bewilder my body to the point where the only thing crazier than what I am feeling right now, is to not be crazy about you.


You turn me on, and not just because you look at me like that, but because you turn ME on. You make me think and feel and want and live as if you were the source of the very breath of me. It is dangerously exhilarating and addictive. It is everything I want for myself and everything I want to be for you.


I dare not question the luck that has brought me to this dream, the lingering sensation of the start of something so real it must be a fantasy. The fantasy that I have coveted for so long but never found, the truth of thought that it does not get better than this. The realisation that I will look back on this intoxication of my mind and body and know that this exact space in time is when it all changed. When my most ardent wish came true, and that wish is you…