The secret is that you must always keep dancing

You know what I have realised?

People are TIRED of miserable people. It is no longer cool to be emo, or sullen, or suicidal. Ok, it’s also not great to be one of those sunshine kids that say words like ‘proactive’ and ‘optimistic’. It, quite honestly, makes you seem like you’re faking it. And faking it is so 5 years ago.

For people of a certain age group, let’s say my age group, the world is what it is and we have to live with it. There is no longer a need to complain about our woes, because we’ve all been broken and damaged by the system or our school or varsity or by ourselves or by our friends or lovers or careers or families or finances. Stand still for long enough next to any one person, any one at all, and you will see their damage, their baggage, the shit they have to put up with. None of us are whole and none of us will make it out alive. It is a fact.

So get over it. Get on with life. Live it and love it despite the tragedy that befalls you, because the truth is that even your most shocking of dark secrets is no longer that shocking in this messed up world. I met a guy the other night. As per usual I found myself dancing alone (and I don’t mean without him boohoo, I mean literally only person on the floor). My friend, thinking I must be feeling pretty self-conscious alone out there (I didn’t even notice or care) said to said guy that he should go and dance with me. You know what he said to her? He in all seriousness said “I can’t, I’m all broken and damaged.”

Now by all means, he is entitled to decline an offer to dance with me. There are few men who survive dancing in my general vicinity without looking like either a plank or an octopus on dry land. But what’s that now about being damaged? I’m not picking on him, of course, I actually think he is far less messed up than what he thinks he is, but my point is that people don’t care. Being damaged isn’t enough anymore. Your twisted past and your wicked cynicism or your black heart no longer distinguish you from the crowd.

Do you know what my secret is? What makes anyone stand out, what makes me stand out is that despite being broken way beyond repair, way beyond what anyone really knows, I don’t make it my focus point. I will not let it be the only definition of who I am. Of course you have to deal with your issues in a healthy and constructive manner. Please don’t misunderstand me, I am NOT advocating repressing your hurt or bottling it up, or being destructive. I’m just saying that while you’re doing all of that ‘proactive’ (urgh) psychologically healthy stuff, there is nothing stopping you from dancing. I don’t talk about my troubles all the time, I don’t dwell on them, I don’t let them consume me and I sure as hell don’t let them stop me from dancing. My point is: You may never get over your damage, but your troubles are not the things that keep your feet cemented on the side of the dance floor. That’s all on you.